Today we heard from Noah's birthmom. I was relieved. I know some people dont ever want to have contact with their childs family but for me its different. I think it is because I didnt ever know my birthfather and grew up in a bunch of different homes. Growing up I was teased a lot for not having a father. It seems so common now that maybe that doesnt happen. When I was 27 I remember meeting my paternal grandmother and seeing that I had her hands and for the first time I didnt have that huge hole, that missing link. I was whole.
So I am looking at this more from the child's POV than from the adults. I dont want Noah to ever have that hole. I want him to have a relationship with first mom and first dad. I want him to meet them and talk to them and know whose hands he has. I want him to know how much they love him and never have a doubt about that.
But because I am looking at it from his POV I have higher expectations I think. I have to understand that this may be too hard for them to call and chat everyday. I also have to understand they are young. The think like we all did when we were young. That doesnt make them bad. I need to be open to how ever much or little they want to interact with us. God put the 5 of us together( Us, Noah and Noah's first parents)for a reason.
I also believe another reason I want contact is because his first mom is just such a cool, wonderful person and I think if we had met differently we could have been friends. Not saying we cant now, I hope we can. Maybe I am too old for her, lol. In any case I hope that our relationship will grow and get strengthened.
Noah is doing well, his audiologist says hearing is fine!! YAY! He sees the optometrist Thursday. Then GI on Monday. After that we are done for a month then the really good appointment we are waiting for the geneticist. Thanks so much for all your prayers and support.
Be blessed!
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