"Not flesh of my flesh, Nor bone of my bone, But still miraculously my own. Never forget for a single minute,
You didn't grow under my heart - but in it"

Friday, October 29, 2010

Help Find Him

This little boy has a future and a hope, God declared that in His word. His name is Vadim. He has adoptive parents trying to adopt him. Unfortunately he was transferred to an institution. His adoptive parents have no idea where. I don't know what we can do other than storm heaven for a miracle.

Today my devotion was on God's timing and how it is always perfect, how to be still and know He is God. One thing I am not good at is being still. This is a situation out of our control and we are forced to be still. I am have to be still but I wont be quiet. All I can think to say is come Lord Jesus come! I hate this! I am angry! This is not fair! Why are children treated like this. Dogs are treated better than these kids. What are you doing to change this? Yes YOU! You reading this blog is your conscience clear? I know for some of you reading it is. You donate to adoptions, you pray for orphans and you live out James 1:27. What about the rest of you?!

WAKE UP PEOPLE THIS IS REAL! Children are being transferred to mental institutes at the age of 4 in other countries because they have special needs. What are we doing? Are we giving until it hurts? When KLove was doing their pledge drive they ask that, are we sacrificially giving? And it hit me, I am not. Shame on me. Instead of a new tv I could have helped pay a child's ransom. Why are we so willing to "like" things on Facebook or say we are going to change the world yet never do anything? We make our one missions trip a year and come home and go buy our designer clothes and expensive coffee and sign up to go on another missions trip on a year. Really? Thats enough? Will that be enough for God to say to me Well done thy good and faithful servant?! NO!!! Its not enough! We need to give until it hurts, raise awareness lift our voices and stop talking about how we are going to some day make a difference and just do it already!

This family is in pain. What can we do? Let's pray. Get the word out. Help fund their adoption. Go to Reece's Rainbow and sponsor an orphan for chritmas look over to the right and follow my blog and I will donate to Warner. You dont want to follow? Fine, there is a chip in that goes directly to Reece's Rainbow for Warner, donate! Anyone local who donates gets a chance to win a free photoshoot by me.

Let's make God proud of us today and everyday. We are living in the last days and time is short. What legacy do you want to leave? Do you want to look back over your life at the end and say I have no regrets or do you want to say, man I wish I had done this. Please help.

Be blessed

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

He said it!!!

He did it all day today, " MAMA MAMA MAMA" Oh what a sweet sound that is. I have had to hear dada for awhile now and was just aching to hear him say mama. Every doctors appointment, "Dada Dada" No sorry Dada is not here Mama is. All day at home "Dada Dada" Nope its mama again. Seriously?!

Well today the wait was over. He was jumping in his jumper and I was editing a photo shoot and I hear, "Mama....Maaamaaa!" I looked over and he smiled, lol. I smiled, could he have just said it? He was kind of far away so it could have been his usual nana so I didnt get too excited. Later after his nap I was changing him and hooking up his feeding and I put him down next to me so I could try to get a hold of SSI (complete failure) and he looks over at me and says "MAMA!" "MAMA MAMA MAMA MAMA!" I heard it that time! How cute is he!

I'm walking on sunshine!

Be blessed

ALSO- 80 MORE FOLLOWERS FOR OUR FIRST GIVEAWAY. Followers get the chance at 2 books and Warner an orphan gets 100. in his account! C'mon!!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

86 more in 4 days

Can we do it? Can we get 86 followers in 4 days? God can! If I get 100 followers by the 1st then I will donate 100.00 to Warner and have my first giveaway!! Yay!! Get excited my peeps! How many of you have like 200 friends on Facebook? How many of you sign up your junk email address(c'mon we all have them) just to get something? So....why not sign up to follow this blog? It doesnt take anything to do and it is FREE and you can win two cool books!

Please follow the blog, I really dont mind if you never ever ever check it again. Just follow and an orphan will get 100.00 and you could win a few books. PLEASE! Im on my knees begging here people. Help change the world, one orphan at a time!


Be blessed.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Look How Big!

Noah is just getting so big. He is up to 16lbs 2oz and is sitting more and more independently. Last night I thought we could celebrate his sitting with a photo shoot. Check them out!

Be blessed

Sunday, October 24, 2010

100 for 100 GIVEAWAY!!!

This will be my first giveaway. I am so excited!!!

Remember I said if I get 100 followers by Nov 1st 2010 then I will donate 100.00 to Warner and have a giveaway? Well c'mon people go to the side of this page and hit FOLLOW. Its that simple. There is nothing else you need to do. You dont even have to come back here if you dont want to. Invite your friends, neighbors, mom's group, teachers, students, strangers, pastors invite them all to hit follow and I will donate 100.00 to Warner and will giveaway 2 free books!

The giveaway will be for 2 really cool books. Simply Fun for Families is a book about saving time and money starting new traditions, creating memorable vacations and much more. Then we have 12 Great Choices Smart Moms Make which touches on how to handle daily challenges of child rearing, listen to and be heard by your kids, make wise choices based on your priorities and gifts, keep in touch with God and draw on His wisdom and strength and develop strong supportive relationships with other moms. These are brand new books in perfect condition. I think they would be a great read for any mom.

So what do you have to do to win? FOLLOW MY BLOG!!! Thats it! When Nov. 1st arrives you still have until midnight that night, but on Nov 2nd I will make sure I have 100 followers and will then put all 100 names in a hat and have a child of mine pull one out and that will be the lucky winner. Then we will announce it on this blog and the winner will need to email me their address. Everything will be photographed or video taped so you know it is fair. So please follow my blog, help save an orphan and get some cool gifts.

Be blessed

Friday, October 22, 2010

Noah's getting some new kicks

I have noticed since we brought Noah home that his feet were...different. I first brought it up to the Ped as soon as we had our first visit. He looked him over and said it was okay a lot of babies get that way so to just do this this and this. Ok. I did. Lately though I have noticed a lot more of his feet turning in, his pinky toe on the one foot always laying across the bottom of the foot and when he stands his feet turn in and he is always on his toes.

I brought it up to OT on Tuesday she said he needs braces but probably not now, DV and PT on thursday and they agreed braces. Although PT says because this is preventing him from good posture and good standing (and some other medical jargon I dont understand) he would need them now. She gave us a note to give our doctor and then gave us the number of a orthotics doctor. I noticed that some of the blogs I read some of their children have these little cute braces those kids have DS. This gave me an idea of what the PT was talking about. Noah's has to be up to about his knees so they are not the same.

Nancy his foster mom knew it would happen eventually, but when I told his birthmom today and she was upset at first. She thought it was scary. Texting something like this may not have been my best decision. I hope she understands that it is braces nothing invasive just a piece of plastic on his legs. I should call her.

Anyways if a mickey button and braces are the worse we have to deal with with Noah we are good right?

Ber blessed

Thursday, October 21, 2010

He cracks me up!

We went to see the surgeon and he says Noah is doing AH_MAZE_ING! He said the granulation tissue is a sign of a healthy baby. Noah does not need on the steroids we had been giving him, for the tissue. He is not on any meds at all. He is doing great on natural vitamins, dha and a probiotic. Unfortunately he still refuses to eat by mouth but we try everyday. That may not get better, but with God all things are possible, Amen? Amen! Recently Paul and I decided it would be ok with us to give Noah's birthmom our cell number so I did and it has been so wonderful. I text her a picture or 10 everyday. Lol. We talk on and off during the day when we are not busy. It is so nice to be getting closer to the woman that birthed my son.I feel like it is only fitting we get to know each other after all she gave us something priceless and we have something priceless of hers. Why shouldnt she have our number or know our names? Each day she becomes more of a part of the family and less just a "birthmom", not that she ever was just a birthmom to us.

I found an awesome shirt at Children's Place. It says Living up to my potential and more. I had to have it right then and there. Noah wore it today. It is so fitting of him.

So what is new with my little man? He is sitting more and more. He is so close to saying mama. In fact last night he actually did say mama twice. Dada is still his favorite word. He has this scream that hurts my ears, it is not a scream of sadness or anger it is a happy scream. Still it hurts my ears something awful. The girls get all giggly and say, 'Noah you scream like a girl!" Lol. He is now 16lbs 2ozs and 28 inches. He is growing. His little hands are getting chubby. He is so beautiful and happy and healthy. We are so blessed. I hope you get a kick outta these pics, we sure did.

Be blessed!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Senior pics

Tonight I had the pleasure of shooting a newly crowned king, homecoming king that is. Remember Marcus? Well tonight I had the pleasure of taking his senior pictures. When he came walking up the hill to meet me for pictures I didnt see an 18 year old young man, no, I saw my little 8 year old buddy who came to my wedding and loved playing basketball with me. My little buddy who only wore ball shirts and could make me cry when he flashed that winning smile. When he got closer I realized he is all grown up. He is about as tall as me, where has time gone? How could it have gone so fast? Oh how I wish I could keep them young forever. Anyways, here are some shots from the shoot tonight.

Be blessed

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Check this out

Go HERE and check out this video a fellow big family mama made. I can't figure out how to get the video on here or I would post it. It is too funny if you have more than 2 children or have adopted or grew up in a large family. Cracked me right up!

Be blessed

Friday, October 15, 2010

First Fundraiser!!!

This will be my official first fundraiser for Warner.Warner is our Christmas Orphan. He is about 2 years old and has down syndrome. For every 1.00 donation you put in the chip in on the right side on this blog I will enter your name in a drawing for a free shoot(excluding weddings) from me. For every 10.00 donation you will be entered in 20 times! I work in the Pittsburgh area as a photographer in case you didnt know. Lol. My website is www.linneaslastingmemories.org This fundraiser will end Friday Jan 1st at midnight.

This will be the first of many fundraisers. Also at this time I will donate 100.00 to Warner if I get 100 followers on this blog by Nov 1st.

Help us raise money for this little boy so he has a chance at a future. Please. Thank you.

Be blessed

In Honor of Noah

Noahs grandma would like to donate Tiger stuffed animals to Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh in honor of Noah. Here is what you can do to help. You buy a cute tiger for 19.99 and that gets donated to Childrens Hospital and ask a thank you you can purchase one for yourself or a loved one for only 10.00

To order one just email Robion Beck @ robinbeck@zoominternet.net or go HERE and place your order. I can not wait to take these to the hospital to make some kids very happy. Thanks so much.

Be blessed

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Noah SITS!!!

That's right! Thats my boy! He is working so hard and look at him. I can't believe it! Everyday he amazes me! I really needed this too. I had been looking online about Noah's trisomy 8q2. I found nothing. Somedays I just want to find others out there like us. I would never want a child to have a disability but really there is no one out there with Trisomy 8q2? There are websites on kids with Trisomy 21 (down syndrome), Trisomy 18(Edwards syndrome), Trisomy 13 (Patau syndrome). I am very glad what Noah has is not full Trisomy 8 which ends in death before birth, he is what they consider Mosaicism.I just wish someone could understand, someone could show me their child and I could say yes, exactly I get that, I understand. People know ADHD, Autism, Asberger and other issues but why oh why can I not find one person with Trisomy 8q2? Anyways, I hope you enjoy the video of our little miracle and just ignore my ranting. I am very happy to have a healthy child I am but sometimes I just want someone to have a child like Noah who is older so I can maybe just maybe get a glimpse into what could be our future.

Oh and if you could please pray that Noah starts to take something, anything by mouth. He refuses now completely and is now tube fed only. This will delay us being allowed to get the tube removed plus it is not good not to take anything by mouth.

Be blessed

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Angel wings

I just got the news from another blog this is what she says.

Anne Marie(real name Anya age 5) has gone to live with Jesus
It is with a very heavy heart that I must share with you the sad news that another of our precious babies from the orphanage has gone to live with Jesus. We are loosing children so fast. If only they had families and the proper medical care and good nutrition.... How VERY real this is. PLEASE, consider bringing home one of these orphans! If you are not called to adopt, PLEASE consider donating to an adoption fund so a waiting family can go get them sooner. These are real people sentenced to death if we do nothing.

Dance with Jesus, sweet Anne Marie, Dance with Jesus!

This doesnt have to be this way. In honor of Noah and in memory of Anne Marie and all the other babies dying without a family please look to the right side of my blog and click the chip in button and donate to Warner, let's bring him home, make it easier on his family to adopt him. Don't let him die without the love of a mama and papa in a cold dark orphanage. Help him. Together we can bring him home! Please donate today! The money goes straight to Reece's Rainbow's account not mine and it goes into his fund and you will be able to see that on their site. Please isnt a life worth more to us than a cup of coffee? Give up your coffee for one day and donate that amount or what ever the Lord leads. You cant get blessings if your fist is closed shut. I guarantee God will reward you. Also if you do not follow this blog please follow it and when we reach 100 followers I will give 100.00 to Warner towards his adoption and one of my followers will receive a gift.

Here is a picture of Warner, pray for him, pray for his family, pray for the donation.

Anya was 5 institution age when she died, Warner is 2. Will you help give him more than 3 years to live? Please.

Be blessed

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Don't forget to help this christmas

Be an orphans Christmas Warrior! Just go to Reece's Rainbow and pick the child you want to sponsor and fill out the form. It is that easy! Yay! And maybe while you are there you will feel led to adopt a child? Who knows. :) If you dont feel led to adopt then you as a Christian should do what God asks and sponsor a child. You know what God says pure religion is?

We chose 2 kids one looks like Noah and the other was born when Noah was. Gosh I wish I could bring them both home and love on them. They may only let us raise money for one but I ask for both. I need to raise at least 1000. from Nov 1st- Dec 31st for each child. If you dont want to try and raise money for a sponsored child on your own maybe you can help donate for our sponsored child. We are going to see about getting a chip in put on the blog so you can donate easily right here. All the money we raise goes toward that child's adoption. The more we raise the more likely a family is to turn up and adopt because the cost will be significantly reduced.

I am going to try and find some very creative ways to raise money for our sponsored child and try to get at least 1000.00 for the child. Do you think I can? Only with God's help and yours. Will you help? Can you pray for us and this child? Can you comment on my blog with some creative ideas to raise money. Can you chip in?

When I get the details on how to donate I will let you all know. I am thinking my first creative way to raise money is if I have 100 followers on this blog by Nov 1st I will personally give 100.00 to our Christmas child, what do you think? So show me some support and follow the blog. After I get 100 followers I will have a random drawing and one of my followers will be given something..I will have to think of what.

Be blessed

Saturday, October 9, 2010


I have to tell you about my friend Marcus. Marcus is 18 years old and last night looking ever so handsome he was crowned homecoming king! When his mama texted me to tell me he made the court I cried, when she told me he won I bawled. You see Marcus, my very handsome friend has down syndrome.

Marcus was 8 years old when we met. He was a short chunky lil kid with lots of spunk. He absolutely loved basketball and ketchup! The kid put ketchup on everything. Ketchup and ranch dip that is. He even dipped his pancakes in ketchup. Hey you like what you like right? Marcus could be a handful but what kid isnt at some point right.

He participates in special olympics and is a wonderful swimmer. His room is filled with trophies and ribbons. He is just like any other teenage boy. Knowing Marcus has only blessed my life more than I could imagine. I hope one day to have a child with down syndrome...yes you absolutely heard me right. Paul and I hope that in the future God would bless us with a child like Marcus. He is such a shining star.

I must say that I am so very very proud of the kids at Marcus's school. For them to pick him and hang out with him and love him the way we all do is just wonderful. Maybe that generation isnt so bad after all.

Be Blessed!

Friday, October 8, 2010

Finally some pics

This is going to be a picture overload blog bc I feel like I have not put pics up in a long time. I have been so busy. I will post about today in another post complete with video. I do want to get the video from the dedication and put it up too. Anyways I hope you enjoy these pictures as much as I do and please continue to pray for our baby.

I did also want to say a big thanks to Nancy for the baby outfit. I have to say, I started to cry because Noah looked exactly how I imagined my son to look. I never thought that vision would come true but that day when I saw him dressed I jut cried and marveled at how great our God is. You know GOd grants the desires of our hearts down to even the little details which we think may be silly but He wants us to be happy. That outfit down to the shoes was how I pictured my son. Never would I have pictured such big beautiful blue eyes but that was my dream. Noah is my dream come true. I dont think I will ever stop thanking God, his birthmom or his foster mom.

Be blessed

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Vomit Vomit and more Vomit

So Noah has not gotten any better. He still is not tolerating his feeds. We have his bassinet propped up and he sits up in a chair to eat. I can not put him in his crib because if he turns on his belly and vomits it could go up his nose or if he is on his back he could choke on it. There is just so much there when it happens.

More and more I am not buying the whole its reflux. When he was younger he had reflux but NEVER vomited. Ever. Why if it is reflux would he suddenly start vomiting. He is on the meds apparently they arent getting into his system fast enough. Something is wrong. I am thinking about finding a natural doctor and seeing what they think. I called the hospital again and they said to get into the gastro but the gastro is booked for months. I will try again in the morning. I just dont know what this could be.

I spent all day on the phone with medicaid and ssi today. That is a mess and a half. I think I have worn myself down so much my allergies are getting worse or I am getting something. It is all totally worth it though and I would not trade one day of my life for a life without my baby.

Pray for him please.

Be blessed.

Monday, October 4, 2010

M*I*A-what a weekend!

So sorry guys! If any of you are still out there reading. This is the weekend Nancy came in to see Noah for his dedication. We had BIG plans. We had WONDERFUL plans. We had FUN plans.

Saturday-Nancy arrives

Five minutes before we had to leave Noah violently vomits and front and back of him is covered. It is coming out of everywhere including his g-tube. We called the surgeons, got him cleaned up and started off to the airport. On our way there they called back. We needed to get to the ER and soon. What do we do? Paul was in the van with Noah in front of me and Gram. He said we should pick Nancy up and then go.

Nancy came down the steps from the plane into a hug and I said,"we have to go to the hospital somethings wrong with Noah."


Nancy and I took Noah and then spent the next six hours in the ER at Children's Hospital. They took x rays, then more xrays with contrast, everyone but the dr examined him. Finally we were about to be discharged when the doctor came in and she said wait we need to call surgery and have them come check him out. After that the intern came back and said so you saw surgery..I was like, no we didnt. He then said well its ok I talked to them and you can go. SIX hours in the ER to be discharged and told nothing is wrong with my son.

Sunday- Dedication Day!!

We were all exhausted and kids were cranky from not going to bed until I got home at 1:30am. I almost thought I would fall asleep in church but the preaching is too good. It was beautiful and Noah was a hit in his amazing white outfit from Nancy and his spiked hair. After we came home and entertained wonderful guest for a steeler dedication party. TYSM everyone who got Noah something. He got a ton of great outfits!! He also got some books and cds. He is very grateful and blessed. During the party he vomited again, but the ER said he was fine so we did nothing.(I will post pics and video in a separate blog asap)

Monday- Planned a day at the Children's Museum, have a wonderful dinner and got site seeing

5am- Wake up to massive vomiting from Noah, he is choking. Paul runs to the crib and turns him on his side. When he stops Paul gets him out of bed and lays him on the floor so we can start to get the clothes off. Noah then projectile vomited again, it looked like 5-6 ozs this time. Paul turned him over on his side so he didnt aspirate. We disconnect the extension from the mickey button and it is now coming out of the button as well. When he stops and after we comfort him Paul gives him a sponge bath. HE did it again. I called the hospital and didnt know who to ask for. I called the surgeon on call. Noah vomits again..about 13ozs total I would say. The dr calls Paul back. He is fine, it probably wasnt as much as you thought it was call later to check in with the dept when they open they said. UMMMM??? Seriously? No way. I ran down the hall and woke Nancy something is wrong with Noah.

We get to the hospital at around 7am. Noah was the only patient in the ER. We got right back and right to a room. Doctor after doctor nurse after nurse all asking the same questions. The surgeons came in. The woman walked in looking 10 feet tall a bohemith of a woman. She came in with a muslim and a dorky little white dude. The muslim never spoke but had kind eyes. The woman took a call and left the room and the dork was there. He said maybe the button was broke. The woman came back she was short with me. She said it was a bug but never looked at Noah. A BUG? No way I was not buying that! They took bloodwork and a new xray.

I felt so alone. I felt like screaming. Something is wrong with my son and they all say its a bug a bug a bug. No one will listen to me or even agree or disagree with one another. What is wrong with him? Why wont anyone listen to me? I was so frustrated. On and off the entire day was spent exhausted and in tears.

Hours later the doctor came in and spoke to me. She ask what I thought of the surgeons. As politely as I could I told her I didnt like them. They didnt care and werent listening to me. Something is wrong with my son I know it with everything that is in me. She said she heard them talking and they were "unimpressed" with Noah. They thought I was overreacting and it was just a bloodwork. Bloodwork came back great. This doctor said she had a gut feeling something wasnt right as did her colleague and wanted to admit Noah to figure it out.

Hours later we went to the 8th floor. More doctors, more nurses, more questions more answers(my answers to their questions not the other way around). Noah had an iv and steroid cream for some tissue growing around the tube. He got to have pedilite and I was on them there like flies on poo. I needed a plan. Paul couldnt miss work, Noah couldnt be left alone, my girls needed their mama and Nancy needed to be at the airport. What could I do? I needed a clone. I pushed and pushed and ask about what could be done. A head doctor came in and we talked at length. She was really nice. She finally determined it to be reflux. We got some medication that was not covered and we were allowed to go home.

Why do some doctors think they know it all? Why can't they understand that these are our children and they are our world so we know if something is not right. We may not be as smart as doctors but we know our children and we know our own bodies and we need to be heard. Something is wrong with Noah but someone listened to me and that made all the difference.

On our way home from the hospital I took Nancy up the incline in the burgh. She really liked it and it was so good to be out and to have done something with her that wasnt medical, lol. Now we are all off to bed after we wash the hospital off of us and tomorrow Nancy goes home, hopefully not before we go to the Children's Museum.

I am so exhausted!

Be blessed